From The Grand Prince, Augustus Emanuel, Principality of Chicago:
21 Obamatober, 2097: The violent crime rate in Chicago has declined dramatically in the last two years. Random gun violence has fallen by almost 40% this year alone.
And this, from the Right Honorable Minister of Political Correctness:
5 Obamber, 2053: The MPC hereby issues the following edict: Effective immediately, when referring to our Great Leader, all persons are required to reference him by his full title: Pharaoh Obama, Our People's Celestial, Heavenly Utterer of Truth and Excellence. The common acronym which has heretofore been used for this title is considered disrespectful and it's use is hereby forbidden.
...and then suddenly I woke up, drenched in a cold sweat. I remembered that I felt awful when I went to sleep last night, and realized that all this was just a very bad dream. I learned one thing from it: never, ever, buy clams from some guy parked on the corner in a pickup truck. Then again, I'm not completely sure it was a dream. When I turned on my computer this morning, my desktop picture of our grandkids had mysteriously disappeared, and this is what I found in it's place: