It's taken me a month, but I finally figured out the Google admin account thing and made the annual payment to keep the site going. Stupid Google making things complicated.
You may all now cancel your plans for the end of the world as we know it.
So if anyone else blogs and has their own domain address they got through Google a couple years ago or so, and you have to update your payment information (and since cards expire, you will eventually), let me let you in on how it's all gone down.
Basically, Google thought once upon a time that it would be a good idea to sell web domains to us bloggers real cheap through them. The domains actually belong to web domain sellers, like Go Daddy and the like, but Google probably makes a bit as the middle man.
Then one day as the Google people were sitting around the board room table, shining their devil horns and sharpening their pitch forks, one of them said "Hey fellas! We should be making more money out of these blogger people." And the others were all "Yeah!" and "Huzzah" and things like that.
So they devised an evil plan, because that's what you call the devilry that goes on at Google, to basically classify a blogger as a "business" and then foist upon us this cloud based business software thing called Google Apps for Work, or somesuch thing. And it was free, originally.
So back in the days when blogs were still made of wood, I made this one and got my domain through Google. And Google devilishly made me some google apps admin account thing I never heard of. I never used it because back then when you paid a fee, you were all like "hey here's some money" and they were all like "hey, cool thanks". And that is how the internet used to work.
But with the evil admin console google devilry, they want you to pay them to allow you to pay them by "offering" this google apps for work which you apparently need to access the admin console and make changes to your payments. I almost signed up for it, as everything I read (from Google of course) said I needed that. Well, it felt odd saying that I had 1 employee in my "business". Then when I saw something about pricing options, I ran.
Eventually I figured out that all I needed to do was find this account and password they made for me a long time ago, and I got it done. But I am scared now because google has my payment information and they might charge me for paying them.
I mean, evil lairs don't come cheap. They have to pay for it somehow.